To the beautiful little girl who made me a mother.
To try and put all of my feelings; everything I want to say to you, in one letter, would be impossible.
How could I possibly detail the way in which you’ve changed my life? You’ve turned it on its head, in the best possible way and for that, I am forever thankful.
Your early entrance into the world should have given me a little insight into the fierce little being you are – a force to be reckoned with. A little girl with so much determination and independence that you’ve put those ‘first week’ predictions back in their box. You’ve well and truly left behind your premature roots yet I’ve no doubt you’ll never shed that ‘warrior’ attitude. Looking back, those first few tough weeks filled with worry and uncertainty – they needn’t have been. You were always ready for this world earlier than most, weren’t you?!
I’ve loved watching you grow and learn every single day – and it’s taken me until recently to realise that I’ve also been growing and learning in so many different ways….
I’d be lying if I said I found motherhood a walk in the park. It’s not something I’d say I’ve taken to ‘naturally’ – yet its something I’ve given my WHOLE self to entirely. I’ve been tested more often than I can count, and undoubtedly will continue to be for the foreseeable future. Yet because of that, you’ve made me braver. You’ve made me stronger. You’ve made me more patient. You’ve shown me a way to love in which I never thought possible.
And for that, I’ll forever be grateful.
Having made so many mistakes in my life before, you’re the most amazing reminder of all the things I’ve done RIGHT. You’re my reason for wanting to keep doing better so that I can be the BEST role model I can possibly be for you…..
I hope you always know how loved you are.
I hope you never let anyone try and shatter your heart on a whim – it took me 8 months to grow it just perfectly. And finally, don’t let anyone tell you you’re not beautiful. You only have to smile to prove to them how wrong they are.
This last year has been simultaneously tough and brilliant – not one person can prepare you for the rollercoaster journey you embark on.
I personally cannot wait for the rest of the ride.
So Happy First Birthday Olivia Helen, may all your wishes and dreams come true. If this has been the love I’ve felt in only your first year of being, I’m both amazed & fearful of the strength it’ll become over the years.
Fifty two weeks today.
Fifty two whole weeks since this little madam arrived.
Fifty two whole weeks of love.